Monday, September 13, 2010

On Friendships

a topic that is underrated or just out right ignored is Friendships! Believe it or to some these aren't that important, why? I don't know and I'll never know. As the years have gone by I've learned to value some friendships and others, well they are just acquaintances.

Life according to luvlyloops seems quite complicated yet it's quite simple. My viewpoints on life have obviously changed throughout the years. What I used to think was perhaps insignificant is now the opposite... huh? simple, I have matured-I mean that is exactly what is supposed to happen when you enter adulthood, right?

Sure I was immature and somewhat caddy/snobbish during my 20's and perhaps up until my early 30's, but no more. I still have my reservations about some things, but for the most part I have let go of a lot. Life is just too short to be mean to others. Now this doesn't mean that I won't defend myself or others when appropriate because one thing I hate is injustice and bullying. I can't stand it and will speak up no matter what.

This post comes about a struggle I went through earlier this year. After a somewhat turbulent brief period, I realized that this person was truly awful. I guess I never saw it. I have always wanted to believe that there is good in everyone and I seriously believed that. Little did I know that people close to me can be fake and thereby twisted. This person in particular was someone very important in my life; someone I truly cared about for many years. Something happened earlier this year that opened my eyes to how he/she really was.

In the beginning, this person was fun, nice, sweet, and spontaneous. We nearly shared the same interests; we had lots of fun but things went sour this past holiday. I don't know what was going on with him/her, but he/she wasn't a pretty person at all. In fact, he/she was just plain mean to me. I don't know what I did to him/her, but I was more than supportive with his/her drama and issues. It wasn't my fault he/she was having drama with his/her significant other; I wasn't part of that relationship.

At that point, I decided that enough was enough. I no longer was willing to put up with this mean person. How come my other friends (new and old), weren't mean to me? Sure there are always problems in every relationship (significant others, BFF's, bf's, siblings, parents), but we try to resolve things by dealing with them. Somehow, if both parties are willing to work things out, things will get resolved and all is fine and dandy.

With me, our issue wasn't new and I did express my discontent many times and was told it would never happen again and apologized. That he/she wouldn't be insensitive anymore and I truly believed. Nonetheless, he/she went back to his/her old ways and made our time together a nightmare (there is no other way to put it). I didn't enjoy my time and I was miserable. Needless to say, this affected the outcome of our event. I hated it and have no good memories of it. I never want to relive it again.

Why now? Why the mystery of the gender of the person? Well this person reads my blog every so often and it's taken me this long to come to terms with it. It was a great struggle for me to write this because I had to relive this nightmare all over again. I guess, now, I somewhat put it behind me. But I will say this, my friendship with this person is no longer the same. We aren't BFF's anymore because BFF's don't do stuff like that to each other. We are merely casual friends. BFF's just aren't mean!
I just hope this person realizes that I have feelings too and that I am human being on this planet that deserves to treated right and to be validated. Peace & love to all!!

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